Yesterday marked the 4th year that my wife and I have been married - three of which have been spent here in Xinjiang, China. While most people insist that "absense makes the heart grow fonder", I am here to say that nothing teaches you more about your spouse than living in a desert with no other foreigners while working at the same school and seeing each other 13 out of 16 hours you're awake. This is a good thing, mind you, not a complaint.
4 years ago yesterday...
While bigger cities in China would have offered us more opportunities for a romantic date, the options in our small city are quite limited. It forces me to be creative - which I was last year and the year before - but certain events leading up to our anniversary this year kept me too busy to plan. My wife was most understanding, but oddly one of my co-workers wasn't.
"So what did you do for your anniversary yesterday?" she asked me.
"Actually, it was a pretty quiet one. Flowers, a nice dinner and a movie at home. It was good." I told her.
She frowned. "Really? That's boring! Why didn't you do something great and romantic like the last few years?"
A bit offended by her response I went on the offensive. "Well...I was a bit busy this year! What does your husband do for your anniversary?" I already knew the answer, and although that sounds a bit mean she wasn't the least bit phased.
"Nothing. But that's the Chinese way. You are Americans and you're supposed to be romantic. We like to watch you!" she said as she smiled.
So there you have it. The romance I try to provide for my marriage, or in the case of this year fail to provide, affects not only my wife (I hope) but also my Chinese friends who are carefully watching and taking notes what we do. Oh the pressure! :)
As with every marriage we have our ups and downs, and as much as I love our home here in Xinjiang I must say this: If we can survive 4 years together in the middle of nowhere, I'd say we're off to a pretty good start.
25 Comments:
Congratulations to you both! Very nice story. So now your role as cultural ambassador is confirmed :)
Congratulations to you both! Very nice story. So now your role as cultural ambassador is confirmed :)
Congratulations! Funnily enough, I will have my four years and two years in China one month from now. :)
Planning to keep staying in Xinjiang?
Congratulations! Funnily enough, I will have my four years and two years in China one month from now. :)
Planning to keep staying in Xinjiang?
Congrats! I've never been big on anniversaries. The one we did celebrate resulted in my falling asleep after dinner. The fact there are two of them (Wedding and reception) taxes my brain.
Congrats! I've never been big on anniversaries. The one we did celebrate resulted in my falling asleep after dinner. The fact there are two of them (Wedding and reception) taxes my brain.
So it seems :) I actually prefer NOT to take on that role, but it looks like I don't have much control of the situation.
Congrats on the upcoming 4 years for you!
Currently our plans are to stay in Xinjiang for another 6-12 months, but that could become longer...who knows.
Congrats on the upcoming 4 years for you!
Currently our plans are to stay in Xinjiang for another 6-12 months, but that could become longer...who knows.
So it seems :) I actually prefer NOT to take on that role, but it looks like I don't have much control of the situation.
Maybe that's why anniversaries aren't big in China, huh? Most of the friends I know here have had multiple "weddings" for their different family members, so that would make it hard to find an exact date to celebrate.
So I'm curious...which date do you both consider your anniversary - the date you got your marriage book or the date you had the actual wedding?
Maybe that's why anniversaries aren't big in China, huh? Most of the friends I know here have had multiple "weddings" for their different family members, so that would make it hard to find an exact date to celebrate.
So I'm curious...which date do you both consider your anniversary - the date you got your marriage book or the date you had the actual wedding?
congratulations to both of you, and hope to see you in Xinjiang (or Beijing) in the next few months!
congratulations to both of you, and hope to see you in Xinjiang (or Beijing) in the next few months!
Good question, Josh. Our actually wedding day was July 31. But, in 2006 it was also Qixi Jie (non-intentional, that happened to be the day we arrived at the registry office). Our reception was October 2. I guess there are three days to content with.
I usually opt for July 31. But Qixi and the reception's proximity to National Day make those easy to remember too.
Recent blog:=- Chinese Food: SPAM
Good question, Josh. Our actually wedding day was July 31. But, in 2006 it was also Qixi Jie (non-intentional, that happened to be the day we arrived at the registry office). Our reception was October 2. I guess there are three days to content with.
I usually opt for July 31. But Qixi and the reception's proximity to National Day make those easy to remember too.
Recent blog:=- Chinese Food: SPAM
Congratulations! I had to celebrate two anniversaries in my first year of marriage (Chinese and American weddings). I'll have to try to convince my wife to choose only one to celebrate from now on so I can at least remember it. Fortunately, all she really wants as a gift is a nice dinner out, which is exactly what I always want.
Recent undefined:=-
Congratulations! I had to celebrate two anniversaries in my first year of marriage (Chinese and American weddings). I'll have to try to convince my wife to choose only one to celebrate from now on so I can at least remember it. Fortunately, all she really wants as a gift is a nice dinner out, which is exactly what I always want.
Recent undefined:=-
Congratulations, you both look very happy :-)
on a completely, utterly different subject, do you know anything about Dr Wang Chenxia? She's a Chinese doctor who reads palms and I'm wondering how her work is perceived/received in China?
Congratulations, you both look very happy :-)
on a completely, utterly different subject, do you know anything about Dr Wang Chenxia? She's a Chinese doctor who reads palms and I'm wondering how her work is perceived/received in China?
Thanks :)
A different subject? I think you're at a completely different school. If you have any questions that are more Xinjiang-specific, though, I'd love to answer that.
Recent blog:=- Teaching Bus Passengers Driving Safety Laws
Thanks :)
A different subject? I think you're at a completely different school. If you have any questions that are more Xinjiang-specific, though, I'd love to answer that.
Recent blog:=- Teaching Bus Passengers Driving Safety Laws
Congratulations! Hey! I am planning to visit Shanghai this July!! Suddenly found an amazing offer at http://tinyurl.com/n5lnku. Its amazing that I will get rooms at Shanghai from RMB278 if I book online between 23rd to 29th June..
My husband and I are also living abroad in Okinawa, Japan. We are fairly newly married (a year and a half), but I think you are right that being together in a foreign country helps you know each other so much more. It's been intense at times as we see how we each react differently to situations, but it's been great too!
Recent blog:=- Day 23 Challenge: Another bizarre beauty treatment
My husband and I are also living abroad in Okinawa, Japan. We are fairly newly married (a year and a half), but I think you are right that being together in a foreign country helps you know each other so much more. It's been intense at times as we see how we each react differently to situations, but it's been great too!
Recent blog:=- Day 23 Challenge: Another bizarre beauty treatment
Post a Comment
Comment Guidelines:
*Comments that do not abide by these guidelines will be deleted*